Round Two, RSD.

Woooo, the appointment I've been waiting for! The ball is now rolling on the surgery for my cervical spinal cord stimulator device.... I didn't know how to do any of this blog stuff during the process for the first one, but I've got a unique opportunity to document the experience again for people considering the treatment for themselves to see it start to finish before going in. Of course I mention(and will continue to mention) that everyone's experiences will vary and everyone's bodies will handle treatments and surgeries differently, but sometimes it makes you feel better to see the physical process, how big the bandages will be, how long the trial lasts, how long someone else was in the hospital for after surgery, when they can expect to have the device turned on, etc. Granted I already have an idea what to expect because I have the thoracic device so I'm slightly less nervous for this, but YIKES they're going into my neck! It's a little scary, even for someone who's been poked and dug into a million times over... As any RSD patient will say, I'm sure, it's worth it if it'll get rid of any of this awful pain.

So, I'm just waiting to get the call setting my trial date. I took my psych eval and managed to pass, I'm still sane, so there's some good news. XD I think the makers of those tests are more crazy than any patients have ever been. Am I allergic to the glass in the jar? Really?!?!

Also, they want to do another RFA(radiofrequency ablation, basically chemical nerve death) on my back. They're really surprised the last one didn't work, because the blocks indicated as a diagnostic test that they would. I'm not thrilled about another round for two reasons. They were extremely painful last time, and without my mom's help I wouldn't be able to afford yet another round of procedures. She shouldn't have to be paying for my medical procedures and appointments at this age. We're giving it one more shot but if it doesn't stick this time I need to pursue other options. I want to get rid of SOME of this pain, the RSD is bad enough, but my back on top of it is just too much to live with.

Any good news?

My ablation seems to have already worn off, or whatever ablations do when they aren't helping anymore.... Sitting through class has been a nightmare again, really painful. There's a month of classes left so I know I just have to get through it, it's not like I have a job, at home I'm in bed almost all of the time, and next term I'm not taking classes because of the cervical spinal cord stimulator surgery I need to get done. I was just really sure it would last longer, so it's pretty disheartening and I really can't afford to do another one with how quickly that much pain came back.

On top of it, my physical therapists have decided it's best for me to stop physical therapy for now and revisit treatment after the surgery. It's disappointing, but I understand it. We weren't making any progress on my back, it was an extra expense considering I have no income coming in until the end of the year MAYBE, and every appointment the exercises were aggravating my RSD. The pressure of the water alone was sometimes enough to aggravate it on days it was already bad. I'm just tired of all of this getting worse and never better.

The guy I've been seeing has been really supportive through all this, and he's decidedly optimistic that things will turn around soon. We were talking on the phone the other day and it was practically painful for me to tell him the news of my appointments and ablation wearing off and such, because I wanted so badly to have SOMETHING positive to tell him. Of course he was great about it and made me smile even though I was upset... :) But still, it's hard, because he wants me to get better, it's like the only option he'll accept, but I can't bring myself to remind him that I've had this disorder for 5 years, and it's only ever gotten much much worse. :(